Headache

It is so hard to accept a situation where you know something needs to be changed and other people remine oblivious to the fact that there even is a problem. The question then becomes, well who's right. Is it that person who sees the situation from a "leave it alone time with heal stand point", making you seem like a paranoid drama started or is it you who sees the damaging effects of the ignorant bliss for what it actually is?
I promise you if I actually knew the answer to that question I wouldn't be sitting here writing this post now. However, I do hold the opinions and views of the latter, which is the position I will write from.
The situation, or problem, as it seems to be in the majority of the mother-daughter fights that I have been having with my mom lately centers around my little sister. My little sister is a special type. She doesn't really do much of aything except internet surf and talk on the phone all day. She's 12 and before you come to the conclusion that she is the same as most girls her age let me further my description. She doesn't like to do ANYTHING else. She doesn't know how to ride a bike, skate, mini golf, bowl, dance, or anything that involves trying something new. She's a "shy type" (<- yea whatever). If it were up to her, which it is, she would be content with NEVER learning how to any of those things and for awhile that bother me. I thought she was missing out on things that kids her age like to do for fun. For the longest time I fussed and fussed with my mom to get her to try something new. If she did then maybe her world wouldn't be so small. Maybe she would be more opened to trying other new things. As time went on I realized that if she didn't want to do it, she wasn't going to do it. End of store, which was basically my mother's entire arguement, that my sister would grow into her own in her own time. So I have pretty much given up on that.
There is, however, another problem which is probably the biggest one of all it just took me until now to finally see it clear. My sister's biggest problem is not her unwillingness to try new things, oh no. She has an issue with communication and possibly even reality. She is rude even to the point of being called evil, which she has been called many times, when it comes to simple things like talking to someone. She is short-tempered and loud. It takes very little to set her off and she always wants things done her way. For example, once I came downstairs while she was watching tv and it was up pretty loud so I asked her why that was. She apologized then turned it down. Just as I'm about to head back to my business she whips around and nearly yells "Why do you care anyway?" "I just thought it was a little loud," I tell her. "Its not like its bothering you," she screams at me. At this point I'm shocked. I'm thinking why does it matter anymore. You turned it down already, which I tell her. Big mistake. This makes her madder and she just goes off. At this point I'm just trying to shut her up by telling her okay its over blah blah blah. I don't even know how it ended. It just did. Even today she woke my mom up, who's been under loads of stress lately, just to wash some of her drawers, because she doesn't like taking showers in the morning. My mother was already washing clothes, but she woke her up specifically for that task, because she was about to take her bath. See stuff like that really pisses me off, because the first person my parents want to blame is me for making her yell or for not helping her .
My mom thinks that its a phase that she'll grow out of in time. What time? She's been like that for 12 YEARS. The thing is when she was little she was a screamer. My parents, were no longer young parents when she was born so instead of discplining her, or punishing her to make her stop screaming they gave in to what she wanted. It was the quickest, and in my opinion, deadliest way to make her stop. She is a product of classical conditioning because of this. Though I may not have gotten the best score on my AP Psy test I do know a little about the subject. When she was little if she screamed she got what she wanted. Screaming equals her wishes equals happy parents until the next time, which was usually like five minutes later. Point is my mother is wrong to think that this is something she'll just grow out of. This is not a part of her personality, its something she learned. She was taught this. I'm just so tired of it. I can't even have a normal conversation with her without fearing that something I say or the way I say it will set her off. She is supposedly this shy, sensitive type personality who cries whenever someone tries to tell her about herself and yet she can explode in someone elses faces when the world isn't going the way she wants it. My opinion is that she isn't really even shy. The only reason why she turns inward around over family members or people she doesn't know is because she finds herself surrounded by people she can't control and she doesn't know how to handle that, because she is only like that around her intermediate. She wouldn't even be like that around me if it wasn't for the parents because I sure would have back handed her a couple of times when she deserved it if they wouldn't've stopped me. And the thing is I know I'm not perfect, by far I'm not, but the difference is I can admit it. My parents don't even choice to see the problem.
My mom told me today that I talk as if my sister is broken when she's not.
She's not? I'll believe that when I'm not the one stepping on the pieces of her distorted personality.